One of our fav teriyaki joints, Kyoto Teriyaki, was done dirty by, of course, Uber. According to a report filed by Fox 13, between November 2025 and July 2025, the little corner joint handed the tech giant something like 1,500 meals at the value of $40,000 and received not even a farthing. Uber claimed the payout delay was due to “security protocols.” For reasons that are mysterious, a business that has been serving Seattle’s key contribution to the Japanese table for as long as anyone on Capitol Hill can remember “required extra identity verification before funds could be released.” A rat is smelt in all of this. And if our senses are on point, this rat is likely AI, whose “intelligence” is massively overrated. The whole mess of this matter was probably finally cleared by a regular old human brain. Of course, this is just a guess. (By the way, Kyoto Teriyaki’s beef short ribs never fail to hit the spot.)
Trump’s second season makes the bold attempt to enter an entertainment sector dominated by Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan series. Intrigue, villainous spies, assassins, and so on. What’s this all about? He “secretly swapped planes” to leave the NATO summit in Ankara, Turkey, this July because he feared “he was Iran’s number one target.” Though they have threatened to kill him, Trump has been nothing but a positive for Iran. Yes, the country got bombed and blasted to bits, but, it has come out of the unprovoked war with powers that have placed it squarely at the center of the region’s economy. And so, Trump’s exceptional incompetence turned out to be a gift for this proud nation of Persians. No one in the Middle East doubts this fact. This is why Trump’s Jack Ryan rip-off lacks the element of suspense. Why would Iran try to kill a golden egg?
Recall that interview with Harrison Ford in 2015. Recall his response when the interviewer informed him that Donald Trump, then running for president, loved how he “stood up for America” in Air Force One. Ford’s response? “Donald, it was a movie. It’s not like this in real life. But how would you know?”
Seriously, John Curley, the states you mentioned that are much better at doing business than Washington (Florida, Utah, Texas, Oklahoma, and Idaho) did not produce a Boeing, a Microsoft, an Amazon, a Starbucks, and so on. Do you realize that Washington’s GDP is nearly $1 trillion? That of Idaho, Utah, and Oklahoma is, combined, roughly $600 billion. Florida has nearly 3 times Washington’s population, but its economy is barely twice its size. Texas has a GDP of nearly 3 trillion, but its population is almost 4 times that of Washington. Republicans are not the Michael Jordans of business. This is the myth of American economic myths.
Inflation apparently is still high and not going down. It’s now at 3.4 percent, a 0.1 increase. The reason for its slight cooling is attributed to stagnant gas prices, a consequence of China’s softened demand for oil. If China were aggressive about consuming oil, then there would be much more pain at the pump for US consumers. Yes, you yo-yos, China is all that’s between you and an energy catastrophe. Also, one possibility for why prices did not rise so fast in July is because millions of Americans decided to think twice about lettuce, a major part of the American diet. When word got out that the popular vegetable might transmit a bug that made you shit hard for weeks, its price plunged by 16 percent.
In Congo, at least 2,000 have died from the fastest-growing Ebola outbreak on record, according to the World Health Organization. Bad roads, work stoppages by unpaid workers, and conflict explain the surge.
As one Minneapolis lesbian I know put it, the defeat of centrist (and lesbian) Rep. Angie Craig by Lt. Governor Peggy Flanagan in the Democratic primary for US Senate is a victory for lesbians because Craig sucks and “we don’t claim her.” Another example of Midwest excellence just a week after Abdul El-Sayed beat a Democratic centrist in the US Senate primary in Michigan. The Trump-endorsed MyPillow guy, Mike Lindell, lost the state’s Republican primary for Governor. We imagine he’s doing this with pillows, HisPillows:
In the adjacent land of cheese, a sadder story: Democrat David Crowley beat Democratic Socialist Francesca Hong in Wisconsin’s gubernatorial primary. This is a surprising result, as Crowley, struggling and tractionless, had dropped out of the race a month ago, only to re-enter days later with Gov. Tony Evers’s support, while Hong led the polls through the final stretch of the race. Her undoing may have been “culture war” bullshit, including her posts about cancelling Thanksgiving (she was not going to cancel Thanksgiving, she clarified), criticizing Valentine’s Day (Valentine’s Day sucks, is pagan), her support for abolishing the police (a relatively popular position in 2020), and being uncomfortable at a fast food joint (Culver’s for my cheeseheads) because the old white people there “didn’t think we spoke English” (an uncomfortable experience).
Wildfire smoke returns: The smouldering tendrils of climate change will reach Western Washington on Thursday and Friday when light offshore winds from a coastal, high-pressure system funnel smoke in from eastern Washington and British Columbia. Air quality won’t deteriorate much, reports KING 5.
August is turning out to be a real bummer. So much heat, so much smoke, so much of everything that makes the life of a true Seattleite miserable. We green goths can only hope that September will do right by us. Yet this morning is pleasant and cool. Today, expect some clouds, a little wind, and a high of 75.
Bring out yer dead: The Seattle Times has the latest restaurant closures, which include Collins Pub, Pioneer Square Saloon, the CID’s Itsumono, Lucky Chinese Restaurant in Georgetown, Nasai Teriyaki in the University District, but not the Nasai Teriyaki on the Ave, thePurple Café and Wine Baron Stone Way, and more.
Add this mouse to the corpse pile 🙁 Magic Mouse Toys—the Pioneer Square classic indie toy shop with no relation to Mr. Michael Mouse—closed permanently after nearly 50 years. The Seattle Times couldn’t reach the owners, Walter and Pamela Powers, for comment. An employee at a nearby flower shop told a Times reporter that it seemed like business as usual at Magic Mouse when she visited the store last month. Another woman said when she visited with her son in July, she noticed a section of the store had been roped off with a sign that read “closed due to staffing.”
A song from a time when chinstrap beards were not cool but were permissible:
