Hey biker guys,
Go fuck yourselves. For almost a year, pedestrians have been hugging the fence while walking through the park between Expedia and the piers, even though there are so many signs reminding you that it’s a shared path. Today, June 4, the pedestrian side finally opened. And you still fuckin drove through all of it like you’re the fuckin truck and I’m Frogger.
What the fuck dude? There was even a group of you. One of you on a fuckin Portland-ass extra-tall road bike tried to apologize when I yelled, “WHAT IF THERE WAS A FUCKIN BIKE TRAIL DOWN HERE, WOULDN’T THAT BE FUCKIN NICE!?” and your scraggly, bearded, and baked-potato-in-a-spandex-sock having body replied, “There’s always fucking pedestrians in the way.”
Excuse me?
Excuse. The. Fuck. Out. Of. Me…?????
Girl. BECAUSE OF THE FUCKIN’ FENCES.
FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU DUDE. BUY ROSE CITY PENNYFARTHING A LOCAL HAZY IPA AT PELETON CAUSE AT LEAST HE SEEMED ASHAMED AND WAS APOLOGIZING. THE REST OF YOU FUCKIN SUCK.
YOU SUCK.
FUCK YOU.
I just wanna walk home and enjoy the sun without feeling like the fuckin Wheelers from Return to Oz are trying to run me down.
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